Alone Together

Like a figure in a glass ball
I was standing still in snowfall
Almost as quietly as a statue
I unfroze the more I watched you
Until you noticed me (again)
You said you could give me shelter
To keep me hidden from the winter
Some place where all the sinners
Are given free beds and dinners
And all alone we're together
It all sounded to me like heaven
A place where strangers are welcomed in
With a warm mouth I kissed you
I tried to tell you how I missed you
I didn't say one word

A dull gray doom in every hour passing. I slip back into the warm memory of waking; the last warm moment I remember before I stretched my hand out into the cold. I think I could sleep forever on the wing of a butterfly, fluttering on the eyelid of heaven. Above the blue earth my eyes behold to see: Judas is a brother to me. And all this pain of being will be lost forever from our memory. For even we deserve some kindness for all our misery.

Spit.

I would be missed.
Lost in a world of sleeplessness
I would be lead astray,
Tenderly coaxed far away
By something as beautiful as you,
Something worth the fire I was pushed into;
I can live a life of endless forgiving,
To carry on through this nonsense of living

Melting Together

Take your time
I have nowhere to be
So spend some time
Looking at me
Open your mouth
I'm listening
Take my hand
Lead me to bed
Because some words
Are better left unsaid
Use your tongue
To dissolve my dread
Reliving the dreams
I thought were dead
Over and over and over again

i only ever knew
the sticky sorrow of loving you
some nights
nights like these
where there isn't a light
hanging in the sky
i'm ready for the end of all things
i'm ready to leave this mess behind
to abandon the joy i never could find
you're off somewhere i can't get
you were there the nights i'll never forget
when you fell against me
when i fell into you
i never came back

“Alone Again”

I restored all the pieces
Picked them up from the floor
Put them in the broken places,
I couldn’t hold her anymore
She always slips through the cracks
It is time to board another train
Hopefully to take me far enough away
Where I’ll never be alone again

"Head Down"

I threw a rope around an angel's neck
I pulled her down to me
Though she struggled at first,
She came down willingly
She asked me to let her go
I told her I couldn't be alone
So I pulled off both her wings
I saw beauty I had never known
She could see the stars in my eyes
Little fires against the deep black
Then all of a sudden I felt awful inside
So I built a spaceship to take her back

"Ghost of What Was"

In my body I stir
You never fingered me for murder
Bur that's not me down there
And me and time
We keep killing each other
Leaving me cured your pain
I never made you happy, did I?
Now the angel of death hangs in the sky
Over the roof of my home
These illusions of sadness
This blade of the night
Under the wolf-faced moon
Where I think about you
Realizing it was all too good to be true
When your legs get tired I’ll offer you my seat
I’m not Jesus but I can still wash your feet
My love, I might be--

"Stumble and Falter"

My son,
I am sorry
For these last tears
I am sorry loved-ones must disappear
I hope you learn to love everyone
The way I have loved you my son

My father,
I am sorry
Gathering small joys
Believing illusions of sadness is a choice
It is hard for me
Choosing to believe

Misplacing the love I always find in thee.

"Wait"

This black eye
These bleeding lips
They are mine
I wore them
For you
If you weren't blind
If only you knew
The wounds that hurt
The most don't bleed
But the distance between
Everything I need
Kills
And I would die for you
And forever see your face
Clueless to what I've been through
I'll die to make both our worlds a better place

"Memory"

tears roll onto her shoulders from the corner of my eye
silent, and stilll, we lay watching the sun rise
overwhelmed beneath this gilded sky
perhaps one day this will all make sense
the depth of sorrow whitch is limitless
the touch of her memory is meaningless

no name

I know it is the dead souls over thousands of years
That brushes over me
It causes the flags to tumble and snap
And moves the snow off from the trees
It is a hell so unseen and frightfully clear
Offered in the sight of all things
Your heavy breathing in the air so near
Shows me how heaven is equally here

“Paradise Upturned”

She has eaten away the parts that were free

Now I’ll dwell in a shack close to the sea

Just a bed, a stove, and a coconut tree

Where the ocean may swallow these memories

And where you can find joy, as I did, in thee

In that place I can’t, for any cost, be

Blind Luck and The Wrath of God

you know you're dreaming
when you can't feel the pinch
you stumbled upon me
and haven't stopped since
all blind luck
and the wrath of god, near
naked, drunk, and alone,
and i wish you were here

"Giving Proof"

The shadow is shared with generosity
Bear witness to its wealth displayed in me
Only starlight slips in through the skyline’s seams
Sleep when you wish, but you dare not dream
You put the utmost devotion in mindless things
A shadow takes the stage while I wait in the wings
The audience wakes when the curtains draw
To find out how beautiful you are after all

"Dreamer"

I slipped into a tired unconsciousnes
After hours of being cold and awake

Dreams are their own reality
And these were so tender and sweet

I held you so warm and dearly
On the shore of some unknown sea
The sun set red against a faraway storm
And was fantastically bright and near
The cracks in our fingers were glowing
And your hair was electric

In my dream you were next to me
But it was only a dream, and I, only the dreamer
And like all dreams and nightmares
They’re only real as long as they last
And I must wake again to the bitter air
While they exist somewhere in the past
Leaving something guilty
Something lasting in the back of my mind
When I woke, I was all alone
This time I know for good
Now everything hurts
Like everything lovely should

“A Mortal to End Worlds”

I look on

At the blind light

I’m down on bruised

And scraped knees

I whisper

Extended prayers

Into darkness

An end is a different

Kind of beginning

Just another Fearful life

Fading fearfully

I Was

The key to life is death
It keeps us counting the days,
The years
And love is a promise
I could never keep,
I am the cheapest liar
Because I don't know truth
A birthday is just
A day
Full of masturbation
And a temporary madness
That stays with me always
And the tears I can't, for the death of me, cry
Fall when I'm brought low
Everyone leaves
That's all I need to know
A small misery was brought
Screaming into the world
On the same day
I was

Rain falls with cruelty
Down onto the windows
As you curse into the dark
Some angels fall like lightning
No tongue with which to bless
In order to defeat the night
You become one with its darkness